A Krul Krul
by ElephantLover66
Summary: Ferid risks his life to discover that Krul doesn't like puns. Not one bit. Oneshot. WARNING: LOTS OF PUNS.


EL: This is my first Owari no Seraph fanfic, and I'm not really sure if it'll go well. My friend (codenamed Mei) and I came up with this one, and we hope you guys out there like it! Mei, do you want to say something?

Mei: Huh?

EL: Nevermind.

Mei: K.

EL: *turns to crowd* I don't own Owari no Seraph, and neither does Mei.

* * *

Krul Tepes's day was was going fine, it was just a normal day. She had no problem with uneventful days and had gotten used to them after living for so many years, so the progenitor was in a good mood. At least she wasn't pissed at someone. Until he walked into the room. The 7th Progenitor, Ferid Bathory.

The third progenitor felt annoyance tug at her and she gave in. _So, this just had to happen_ , she thought. _He just had to walk in here. Why is he still alive? Didn't I kill him last week? Oh wait. Nevermind. I only cut off his legs. I really should get one of those cursed weapons from the humans. That would be so satisfying, to stab him right in the chest and just impale him, sticking the weapon all the way through. And then he will dissolve and there will be nothing of him left._ She sighed at the thought, knowing that it would not be happening anytime soon. So she would just have to deal with him. Until then.

"Why, hello Krul," Ferid Bathory said in his silky smooth annoying voice, "Isn't today such a lovely today? Of course, it isn't as lovely as you." It was such an irritating expression he had on his face. Krul held back the urge to murder him right on the spot, but decided to hear him out first.

"Get lost, Ferid Bathory. I have better things to do than deal with you." She pronounced his name with disgust, not even wanting to look at him.

He pretended to wipe nonexistent tears from his eyes. "How could you be so Krul?!"

 _Screw holding back_ , she thought before she kicked the 7th Progenitor to the ground mercilessly. "Would you mind repeating that for me?"

"It was just a joke, Krul. You should learn to be less Krul all the time." Ferid smiled mischievously, trying to hold back a laugh and instead gave a smirk.

Blood as red as rubies flew into the air and splattered onto the smooth floor as the pink-haired vampire drew back her hand. She heard something land on the ground behind Ferid with a slight _thump_. It was the hand that she had just detached from his arm. Krul smiled widely at the sight before her. She could kill Ferid. Right now. But she was going to have some fun first, just like how he was playing with her.

"Well, if I'm a Krul Krul, that must make you a Ferid Trashory. Is that correct?" Krul said, looking down at him with a murderous gaze.

"Come on, Krul. Stop hurting my feelings. This is what I mean when I say you need to stop treating people with such Kruelty. Nobody will like you, not even me." Ferid walked over to retrieve his severed hand. He attached it back to his arm and flexed it.

Krul easily grabbed Ferid by his shirt collar, dragged him to her room's balcony, and raised him above the ground. There was only certain death left for Ferid.

"Speak up. You're practically whispering. Announce it the world, if you don't mind. _I dare you,_ " Krul challenged him.

Before Ferid could respond, a guard knocked on the door of the room.

"What is it?" Krul asked dangerously.

"Third Progenitor Krul Tepes, the Progenitor Council meeting is about to begin."

"I'll be right there." Krul smiled sadistically. "But let me take out the trash first."

"Trash?"

"Yes, trash. Now go away, you're bothering me."

"Of course, my queen." The guard said.

Ferid made fake and unconvincing sobbing sounds. "My Krul Krul, how could you call me trash so casually? Just let me have some fun every now and then. You need to tame your Krul temper. Now would you mind letting me go?"

"My pleasure... Ferid Trashory." Krul released the pest and watched gleefully as he fell down... down... down...

Ferid looked up at her, still wearing his atrocious smile, and shouted, "Even when you're so Krul, I will still love you!"

Krull yelled back, "I wonder if you can still do that in hell! Oh, and _FUCK YOU FERID BATHORY_!"

"I thought it was Trashory!" she heard before there was a loud thump.

* * *

 _ **At the Progenitor Council meeting thingy...**_

15th Progenitor Lucal Wesker quietly sipped blood from a delicate wine glass. "Where is that Ferid Bathory?"

Krul simply waved her hand carelessly. "Who knows what that man does in his spare time?"

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.

"Vampires who are not a part of the progenitor council are not permitted to enter." Krul stated, annoyed. There shouldn't have been anyone knocking on the door at this time. Unless...

"Oh, my lovely Krul! I managed to get here on time! I can't keep my Krul Krul waiting for too long, right?"

"Ferid, the meeting is about to conclude. Care to explain your absence?" Vampire noble Crowley Eusford looked up drowsily at Ferid.

He smiled slyly. "Why don't you ask Krul that question, hm?"

"Excuse me. I have some urgent business to take care of right now."She glared at Ferid. "I'll be taking my leave," Krul quickly said without pausing.

She dashed out the door, dragging Ferid Bathory behind her. Even when the council room was miles away, the vampire nobles could hear Krul angrily cutting off Ferid's arms and legs and threatening to slice off his tongue so he could never talk again while Ferid laughed loudly and repeatedly shouted "Krul Krul" and "How Krul of you!"

Nobody saw Ferid Bathory, the 7th Progenitor, for a month after that incident.


End file.
